As our eight children have grown up we have stumbled through parenting just like everyone else, and every now and again we stumbled upon something that worked. One of these little gems has been with what comes out of the mouth. James addresses our tongues.
James 3:9-12 With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.
If one child insulted the other, we would make them look the offended one in the eyes and state 3 things they like about that person. Kids being kids (and sinners being sinners) you could not say, “I like your hair, I like your nose, I like your teeth.” They had to be genuine compliments. “I like the way your eyes sparkle when you tell a joke; I like your hair when it is French braided because it makes you look very pretty, etc.” Without a single exception, the offended child would begin to smile, and more often than not, would send a compliment back even though they were offended just a minute ago! It quickly changed the temperature in the room from cold and chilly to warm and welcoming.
This passage is also very convicting when it comes to gossip. Although we laugh about gossip (You will never hear me repeating gossip; so, listen close the first time), to God it is not a laughing matter. How can we praise our Lord and Father, and in the next breath curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness?
James is truly a practical man. Yesterday we looked at the fruit that comes from loving God in our hearts, and today the overflow of our mouths reminds us that a good tree produces good fruit. Our words are seeds and the seeds sown will grow flowers (or fruit trees) or weeds.
Today may He use our words (and not just our deeds) to point others to Himself. May we go throughout our day scattering the words whose seeds will grow flowers and fruit trees. May we learn to keep our mouths shut if we don’t have something nice to say, or to tame the tongue from gossip (James 3:3-8). We don’t need any more forest fires. And we certainly need more flowers than weeds.
Our song for today is Kindness by Steven Curtis Chapman.