John 20: 11 – 18 (NLT)
Jesus Appears to Mary Magdalene
“Mary was standing outside the tomb crying, and as she wept, she stooped and looked in. 12 She saw two white-robed angels, one sitting at the head and the other at the foot of the place where the body of Jesus had been lying. 13 “Dear woman, why are you crying?” the angels asked her.
“Because they have taken away my Lord,” she replied, “and I don’t know where they have put him.”
14 She turned to leave and saw someone standing there. It was Jesus, but she didn’t recognize him. 15 “Dear woman, why are you crying?” Jesus asked her. “Who are you looking for?”
She thought he was the gardener. “Sir,” she said, “if you have taken him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will go and get him.”
16 “Mary!” Jesus said.
She turned to him and cried out, “Rabboni!” (which is Hebrew for “Teacher”).
17 “Don’t cling to me,” Jesus said, “for I haven’t yet ascended to the Father. But go find my brothers and tell them, ‘I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’”
18 Mary Magdalene found the disciples and told them, “I have seen the Lord!” Then she gave them his message.”
Mary is distraught! She had gone to the tomb very early in the morning with friends to perform a proper burial and they had found the stone rolled away and the body gone. She rushed back to tell the disciples, and Peter and John had run all the way to the tomb. It appears that they returned to the disciples, but apparently Mary missed them on the way back, so she didn’t hear their conclusions about what they had seen. Now she is back in the garden again, and she is crying.
Grief is a blinding and confusing time. The days after my husband passed away, I can remember some things clearly, but many things are a blur. It’s almost like your brain shuts down as a protective measure so you can survive the grief. It appears that was what Mary was experiencing. She stooped to look into the tomb – perhaps she was trying to believe that Jesus’ body really wasn’t there – or maybe it was and she missed it the first time. Perhaps you’ve experienced something like that in your life. You know something is true, but you can’t seem to really wrap your head around it.
Mary looks into the tomb and sees two white-robed angels sitting at either end of the burial space. They ask her in a loving way why she was crying. She answers them and then turns around and goes back into the garden. I kind of shake my head. She saw angels, just asked questions and turned around???? You’d think she would be in awe of the angels, or maybe she’d ask the angels more questions about Jesus. Grief shadows things.
As she turns around, she sees a man she thinks might be the gardener. Jesus even talks to her and asks her two questions – Why are you crying? and Who are you looking for? You’d think she would recognize his voice or recognize his face/appearance. But I expect she was too distraught to really understand what was happening. She loved Jesus and had followed Him for the past couple of years. Then she had witnessed that dreadful crucifixion. I can’t imagine what that would have been like. I know I haven’t watched The Passion of the Christ directed by Mel Gibson because I don’t think I could have watched the gruesome details of that movie. That kind of horror leaves me with nightmares. Mary had actually been present for that horrific experience. Then, when she arrives at the tomb, the body is gone. I don’t think one could experience anything more devastating than that. So, I can’t really be critical of Mary’s response. How could Jesus be alive after what she had just seen over the past three days?
But what I love even more is Jesus’ response. He just lovingly says her name. Remember these verses from John 10 when Jesus was comparing Himself to a good shepherd?
“But the one who enters through the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. 3 The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep recognize his voice and come to him. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out.” … I am the good shepherd; I know my own sheep, and they know me (verses 2, 3; 14)
When Jesus says her name, Mary recognizes Him. From that deep pit of grief, joy bubbles up. Jesus doesn’t criticize her or ask her why she seems to be so blind. He just says her name. Sometimes when really difficult things happen to us, we end up confused and distraught. We don’t see things clearly, and we miss helpful things right in front of our noses. Sometimes we feel guilty for not being “Christian enough”, believing that God is with us and we should be calm. Or, we get angry at God wondering why He seems so far away. But the truth is – God is present, and He is willing to wait until we are ready to hear His voice.
The other interesting thing about the story in these verses, is that Jesus gives Mary a job to do. He reestablishes their relationship, and then sends her to tell the disciples that He is alive. He could have done it Himself, and He does do it later. But at this moment, He sends Mary. Perhaps Jesus knows sometimes we need something to do to be able to recover from hard things. We need to know there is purpose in life. I’m not saying each of us should just jump right up after a difficult time and get going. We often need a time of quiet to recover. But there is a purpose for the future, and God has plans for us no matter what situation we find ourselves in now.
I am so thankful I/we have a loving God who understand us and our weakness. He is willing to go to incredible lengths to make sure we can have a relationship with Him. And He has plans for us that will lead to joy.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. 12 In those days when you pray, I will listen. 13 If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. 14 I will be found by you,” says the Lord.”
Jeremiah 29: 11 – 13 (NLT)
Our song for today is God of All My Days by Casting Crowns